Half Life
by Darth Yuthura
Summary: Gabriel Logan learns the truth of who he once was. If things couldn't be worse, Bastila had also been lost to him. Now the former Sith Lord must not only deal with the truth of his former identity, but also to pursue the last star map and save the galaxy


Okay, this is the start of a short fiction that I intend to extend about ten chapters. I've already got about half of it completed, but just haven't gotten around to publishing it. Told from a first-person point of view, this is to be how Revan comes to learn the truth about himself and eventually how he deals with it. The second character I've chosen was Mission because she and he will be spending a lot of time together for this story. I won't spoil too much for potentially interested readers, but I do wish to get feedback so that I can make some final changes before updating new chapters. Needless to say that I've still got a lot to improve upon when it comes to action scenes. I seriously need advice on what they lack and how to improve upon them. There will be several times when Revan will need to get his lightsaber out and fight, so I REALLY need as much advice as possible so that I can improve what I do for later chapters.

I don't own Star Wars or any of the characters.

I'll also take and answer questions, as well as requests. I'm not above taking a good idea simply because it wasn't mine.

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Revenge Served Cold

I couldn't escape the irony of our situation. After having fought our way to the Leviathans bridge, I found myself hesitant about opening the door that stood between us and Admiral Saul. Carth had lead us all the way, and I almost expected him to go in with guns blazing; but he instead left me to make the next move.

"The door's unlocked. Saul's waiting for us." He told me, stepping back from the control panel. "Whenever you two are ready..." Carth said as he loaded a fresh power cell into his rifle. "...let's end this."

Bastila tried in vain to calm his anger, unaware that he was fully in control. "Carth..."

"Saul is vein. He'll let us walk onto the bridge. Give us a chance to surrender. He's going to be well-protected; he'll think he has the upper hand. He won't shoot unless we shoot first."

I couldn't help wondering what was going through Carth's mind in that moment, but we didn't have any time to argue. I had serious objections to that plan. "I don't want him to seal us in, Carth. Our best chance..."

Bastila defended his plan, interrupting me in the process. "We don't know what is awaiting us, Gabe. This would at least give us a moment to assess their strength... and then strike."

I hated admitting it, but I had to agree with her. My original plan was to take a position outside the bridge and pick off the guards one by one. The last thing we would have wanted was to find ourselves facing an overwhelming force with no means to fall back. Then I realized we weren't going anywhere unless we disabled the tractor beams. I reluctantly nodded and looked to Carth. "All right. Wait for Bastila and I to make the first move."

"Don't worry about me. Take out any dark Jedi he has... I'll take care of the rest. And then Saul is mine."

Planning ahead was often futile when engaging in a fire fight, but if there were any dark Jedi protecting Saul, it was up to Bastila and I to take them out in the opening moments. If we were to stand any chance against the other soldiers making up his bodyguard, the ones wielding lightsabers had to be eliminated first. That much was certain.

But even then, there may have been a dozen or more of Saul's best soldiers, all armed with assault rifles. The odds seemed so stacked against us that I was reluctant to continue. It wasn't hard to forget how many times we've faced overwhelming odds in the past. Carth and I finding Bastila and just barely escaping the destruction of Taris. The crew of the Ebon Hawk then being dispatched on some long-odds mission to find star maps and defeat Darth Malak. All of us being captured by the Leviathan, only to be saved by Mission.

We must have been the luckiest people in the galaxy. No matter how foolish we were or how recklessly we dive into a situation, somehow we always manage to beat the odds.

I wished I could say I had every confidence we'd do so again, but the truth was that I always expected the worst to happen. Unfortunately, we had no other choice. If we didn't step onto that bridge and disable the tractor beam, then everything had already been lost. We either had to win or die... Malak had other options.

The opening moment of any fight was always the most difficult, as so much rested on making your opening moves just perfectly. Once a fight broke down into chaos, you were left to making it up as you went. The opening move was the only time you had the means to plan ahead and follow a predetermined course of actions. Once it started, it became impossible to plan any further ahead, as your enemy was just as determined to stay alive as you were of defeating them.

Through our Force bond, Bastila and I coordinated our opening moves perfectly. Saul only had three dark Jedi protecting him, of whom two fell in the first few seconds of the battle. Through our bond, I told Bastila to fall back and protect Carth while I went for the third. Despite being surrounded by soldiers armed with blasters, I was in a position to place myself behind Saul. Preparing to make another Force jump, I realized that the admiral had disregarded me, instead raising his pistol to shoot Bastila.

She had been unaware of the danger, and Bastila's attention was drawn to the pair of soldiers firing at her from the opposite direction. With only a split-second to act, I went for Saul. Despite Carth's desire to do it himself, I had to stop him from killing her at all cost. I threw myself into the path of that weapon and performed a barrel roll in midair with my lightsaber in hand.

I heard as the blade of energy made contact with something before I landed on my back. It was my intent to cut off the admiral's hand, but I didn't hear a scream of agony. Saul instead backed away and shouted at the last of his dark Jedi. "Kill them!"

Rolling back to my feet, I got only the briefest glance of Saul's destroyed pistol laying on the deck... before finding that third Jedi lunging at me with his lightsaber. With only another split second to act, I was caught off guard. With the Force, it was possible to anticipate such attacks; but it was not always possible to counter what you knew was coming. Instinctively, I moved out of the path of the lightsaber, but had thrown myself into a corner on my right side... it was a fatal move.

Although I managed to dodge his lightsaber, I dropped mine in the process. I did have a reserve saber on my belt, but it was wedged between my body and the bulkhead... there was no way for me block the next strike.

Bastila sensed my panic through our bond, but there was no way to react in time to save me from her position. Suddenly I got a direct order from her... to grab onto the control panel in front of me? I couldn't quite figure out what she meant, but I did notice there was a computer console just within arm's reach. When she waved her arm to manipulate the Force, I suddenly realized what she had intended to do.

Bastila used the Force to knock that Sith off his feet and directly in my path. There was a window just behind me she intended to send that Sith through the glass. Diving for the console, I barely dodged the Sith as his body became a projectile. Almost the instant I had my arms wrapped around the base of the terminal, I heard the glass shatter and felt the sudden drop in air pressure all around me.

It seemed more like being caught in a wind storm than anything else, but the air in the compartment rushed out into space... and I was barely a meter from the breech. I held onto the console for dear life, knowing all I had to do was hang on for a few seconds. Emergency bulkheads on the bridge were designed to seal such a breech within a few seconds of detecting a sudden change in pressure, but those few seconds seemed like an eternity for me. If I slipped, I was dead. It couldn't be any simpler than that.

When I felt my body tumble back to the deck, I knew it was over... the relief was so great that I nearly forgot about Carth and Bastila. Virtually everyone left in the compartment had since forgotten about the three of us. No one had been left standing, but the remaining few guards scrambled to grab the weapons they had dropped during the depressurization event. The three of us knew it wasn't over yet, but the tide of battle had turned in our favor. Only four Sith soldiers remained and most were without their weapons.

Unfortunately the physical effects from the depressurization were very hard on my body. My joints felt like they were on fire, my ears were ringing, and I couldn't open my eyes. Bastila and Carth were much further from the breech than I, which was why they were still able to fight. A few seconds later, Bastila piled herself onto the deck right next to me. "Are you all right?" Struggling to breathe, I nodded. Bastila then pried my arms from the console that I had yet to let go. "It's all right. It's over. You can let go now."

Knowing I was going to be fine, Bastila then lifted her head. "Alright. Now we can take out the tractor beam emitter. Carth.. Carth?"

Unfortunately there was more on his mind than we were aware of. With a Mandalorian assault rifle in hand, the weapon hung at his side and he stared out one of the windows. Although I couldn't open my eyes at that point, I could only guess as to what troubled him. "Saul... he's gone."

It was then that we realized Saul must have been pulled into space, along with several of his troops. Bastila didn't seem to appreciate his desire for vengeance, but she tried to comfort him. "It's over now, Carth. Saul's dead."

"This isn't how it was supposed to end. Killing him was all I had left..."

Bastila repeated herself, urgently. "I'm sorry Carth, but we need to get off this ship before Malak arrives. Please get on that tractor beam!"

I had to assume by the tone of their conversation that Saul's body wasn't among the dead, but there was something deeply wrong... I still felt his presence somewhere in the room! Barely able to breath, I opened my eyes and forced out what little air I had left in my lungs. "Saul... he's still here."

It took a few seconds for both of them to realize what I meant, but Carth quickly shot himself around and fired a burst from his weapon. I could barely make out the slight distortions in the air which came from a stealth field generator, but Carth seemed to know exactly where he was and hit Saul at least three times before he became visible.

When the stealth field revealed him again, Saul had a vibroblade in a ready stance... nearly level with Carth's neck. Despite dropping the weapon he carried, Saul somehow managed to remain standing a few seconds after receiving those mortal wounds. Grasping his chest, Saul glared at Carth as though he had been cheated of the pleasure of killing him. As though he deserved to kill Carth for what he's done.

"The admiral! He's still alive!" Bastila exclaimed.

Saul fell onto his back, struggling to stay conscious. Carth realized that he had finally fulfilled what he set out to do, but that it was not over until Saul was dead. He pointed his rifle at the admiral's head. "Not for long."

Bastila tried to stop him, but I held her back... that was something Carth needed to do and she had to understand that. I just shook my head and whispered into her ear. "Don't. He needs this."

She looked back into my eyes and wondered how the hell I could say such a thing. To even suggest that we allow a friend to carry out his revenge and give into his hate... no Jedi would encourage it. Unfortunately Bastila didn't understand Carth's pain as I did. After losing his family to that monster, the only thing he had left was to end Saul's life.

Once Bastila realized I was serious about letting Carth do as he must, she reluctantly nodded and twisted her head around... hoping that he wouldn't pull that trigger.

"Carth..." the admiral weakly called out. "Carth..." He raised his hand and gestured his executioner to approach.

As Carth twisted his head around, it almost seemed as though he were silently asking permission to hear Saul's dying words. Maybe he simply wished the two of us weren't on the bridge with him. He might simply have wanted to just pull the trigger and not allow his nemesis what few seconds he had left. In the end, Carth lowered his weapon and then kneeled beside the dying admiral so that he could hear whatever Saul had to say.

While the two of them were occupied, Bastila helped me to my feet. My joints still hurt and my ears continued ringing, but I had be ready to start running once the Ebon Hawk was clear to launch. She knew that I could stand on my own, but still wanted to throw my arm over her shoulder and help me. It was then that our eyes met and we each knew exactly what the other wanted more than anything in that moment. Bastila and I had endured so much together over these last few months and there was still so much I wanted to share with her. I came so close to dying just a moment ago that I realized just how fragile our bond really was, and how easily I could lose her forever.

It was then that I placed my hand on the back of her neck and whispered into her ear. "And this is something I have to do."

It was almost like the kind of thing you read about in stories... the kiss. Although Bastila tried to resist, she stopped pulling away once she felt my lips pressed firmly against hers. It was like the sudden eruption of emotion and pleasure seemed to drive away all her fear, and then she closed her eyes and savored that moment for all it was worth.

I couldn't escape the irony of our situation... how the two of us share such an intimate moment while Carth and Saul exchanged exactly the opposite feelings only a few meters away. When she heard Saul whisper something behind her, Bastila opened her eyes and was suddenly terrified beyond anything of who she had kissed. Her every instinct was to push me away and purge herself of those feelings like I had given her a death kiss.

After hearing Saul laugh so close to his end, he spoke just loud enough for us to hear. "Surprised, huh? *cough* That's who you believed was your friend. You may have had the satisfaction of revenge *cough* but I will die with the satisfaction of knowing I'd destroyed everything you hold dear. Ha-ha-ha... *cough*"

With Saul's dying breath, Carth exclaimed and shot back to his feet. "No, it can't be." Turning his eyes on me for some strange reason, he looked as though he were looking at a ghost. "It just can't. Bastila...!"

Bastila's mouth hung open like my saliva were a deadly venom that had poisoned her soul. Her reaction was beyond horrified. Through our bond, I could sense such terror within her... something about what Saul just said really spooked her. And although he didn't see what we had just done, Bastila believed that he had. "Carth, it's not what you think."

"It is true, isn't it! You knew this entire time, didn't you!"

I had no idea what Saul had said to Carth, but I felt it was only meant to hurt him. But why Bastila? I had never seen her so afraid. "Please Carth, calm down."

I tried to convince him to listen, but he seemed even less willing to hear me out than Bastila. It was then that I got straight to the point and gave him a direct order. "This isn't the time, Carth. We have to get out of here before Malak arrives. You must..." I tried to put a hand on his shoulder, only to have it shrugged off. Then I lost my patience and barked at him. "The tractor beam... now!"

To my surprise, he didn't seem alarmed by my outburst, although Bastila certainly jumped at hearing me raise my voice. Carth just glared at me for a long moment, eventually turning to her. "Can we trust him?"

Holding her hands together, as if to beg, Bastila answered. "Yes, absolutely. And I will explain everything once we're safely on board the Ebon Hawk."

Carth faced me again for a brief moment before turning his attention to the bridge console that controlled the tractor beam. "All right... but I expect some real answers."

As he turned his attention to the console, I took a moment to search for the lightsaber I had dropped in the fight. I had hoped it wasn't sucked into the vacuum of space, but I couldn't see it anywhere. When I had turned to ask Bastila what was going on, I found her holding it for me. "We weren't as close to the breach when it happened..." And then she offered it to me. "...I was able to save it."

I took back my weapon and thanked her... more for saving my life than the weapon.

More distressed about what Saul told Carth than I've ever seen her, Bastila was keeping a secret from me. I knew she wouldn't say anything more about it, but it was clear to her that I knew something was wrong. Grasping her shoulders and looking my loved one directly in the eye, I did not know what could possibly instill such fear into her soul. As desperate she was to shield her thoughts from me, I had to ask. "Bastila..."

She looked away and shook her head. "Please just trust me. I will tell you the truth... all of the truth, but not until we're safely away from this place. I need you here, focused..."

"What truth?" I asked, almost desperately.

She pushed herself away from me. "Not before then. Please do not ask me again."

When I heard beeping from the console in front of Carth, he grabbed his weapon and gestured for the door. "Tractor beams are down. Let's get the hell out of here!"


End file.
